Now that we've established some rules of the road, let's get started on car rules. Again, here are a few of mine:

1) There is absolutely no bumper sticker witty enough to be posted on my car thus maring it's paint forever - Not vote for, not honor student and definitely not some kid pissing on something
2) No bullet holes, I mean c'mon
3) White walls? White walls? Again, c'mon.

c'mon man,

this car HAS to have whitewalls

http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/8/web/2240000-2240999/2240174_13_full.jpg

Yeah, I agree with aneverything but the wthiewalls. Gottar had the whitewallsl on yoru var.

Yeah, I agree with aneverything but the wthiewalls. Gottar had the whitewallsl on yoru var.

hey, at least you can decipher this one. hahaha :alchi:

Ok, ok. Man law says no white walls on any car post 2002.

1.Nothing hanging from mirror,period!
2.Absolutely no bobbleheads,anywhere!
3.Garfield stuck to the window,I'll shoot!
4.Vinyl decals of any kind will not be allowed!
5.No suction cup sun visors!

Ok, ok. Man law says no white walls on any car post 2002.


lol, thanks.

1.Nothing hanging from mirror,period!


bu,bu,but my leopard print fuzzy dice!!! lol.

Leopard print fuzzy dice are cool! everything else hanging is dumb.

And no post 2002 white walls is good... but I still think vogues look good on the last Deville.... what?!?


The no bumper stickers reminds me of the time when me and a friend of mine were sort of at war, and I put #1 Princess and "I'm not gay but my boyfriend is" bumper stickers on his car lol, the marks are still there! the bast part is he drove around for like a week without noticing them. Oh, and he has a '96 Sentra, so ne harm done.

No suction cup visors?

I'll break that rule until im finally convinced to keep my current car, when that day comes Ill get some real tint, but in Texas without A/C :rant2: I think Ill stick to the suction cup visors and windshield visor

Nothing hanging on the rearview?

Parking passes an exception? lol
I like the pass in my rear view window better then the one my school requires to be stuck on the back window, If it is not stickied on the outside you are subjuect to a ticket ( I got a verbal warning by campus police on first offense. I had it taped on the inside, then a ticket which I never recieved on the 2nd, Got 2 letters telling me I had outstanding tickets, went thier and said I never got a ticket on my car and my pass was properly displayed and they voided it :thumbsup:

Now I have to put this years on which means getting all the goo off my back window :bigroll:

The most important rule,No Map in car unless your genitals have been removed.

The most important rule,No Map in car unless your genitals have been removed.I don't get the deal with no maps. I use maps for a living and have a road atlas with me wherever I go. Just topping off the brilliant navigator mind I have with a little extra info.

Ok, ok. Man law says no white walls on any car post 2002.
Sorry, but the Town Car L looks much better with whitewalls. My '04 has 'em!

I don't get the deal with no maps. I use maps for a living and have a road atlas with me wherever I go. Just topping off the brilliant navigator mind I have with a little extra info.
Hand held GPS,no folding,poi's,to many features to list.The manliest of car gadgets.Don't leave home without it!!!!!

you need the white walls on big ol boats

Regarding my deVille:
No messy foods inside
No bumper stickers, especially political ones!
Keep it clean!
Nothing hanging from the inside mirror,that's just girly
No more than 5 inside
no smoking

With my STS:
No messy food
No stickers (even though ill have to have a parking one when I move to college)
ALWAYS CLEAN!!
IF YOUR SMOKING YOUD BETTER BE ON FIRE!
Gotta have the fuzzy dice.

My big rule is all trash is stored on the floor in front of the passenger seat.
Only I am to lean on the car.
Feet off the seats.
The chrome must be shiny at all times.
Other than that dont touch the leather in a harmful way or spill anything on it and for the love of god dont crack the armrests.

1. If your shoes are dirtier than normal, you're taking them off.
2. Keep your cell phone in your pocket, not on my zebrano console.
3. Wheels must always be clean, exhaust tips too.
4. Rear headrests stay up, 1 click forward.
5. Touching the windows and leaving fingerprints is a no-no :tisk:
6. The rear has 2 doors for a reason, no need for everybody to cram in through 1.
7. Air fresheners are for the weak
8. No eating in the car, drinks are ok as long as they're in a bottle with a cap.
9. Fog lights always on at night
10. Only sticker allowed is my school parking sticker, its only 2"x2"

With my STS:

No food of any kind to be consumed inside
No drinks allowed. An exception may be made for water at my discretion
If your shoes are dirty take them off and I will put them in the trunk in a bag
No putting gym bags or anything else on my leathert seats as the plasrtic bits cause dents and scratches.
Do not slam my car doors
Do not lean on my car
Do not put stuff on the roof,trunklid or hood

1. don't give me directions. Especially when the nav is programmed.
2. keep it clean. Point at the nav screen, don't touch it.
3. no comments on my driving please
4. don't say anything bad about my car! And don't brag about your car.
5. use the handles to open and close the door. Not the egde of the window or door!
6. ask permission to change the radio station or skip a cd-track
7. Don't open the window on the highway. I got a sunroof and CC...
8. i don't need your style suggestions. I am well confident.
9. the coolest sits in the front when my love is not around. Same for best looking...
10. don't block my view. And don't bother me with questions when I am concentrating on traffic and directions!

what about keeping your catch rag out of sight...?
Also, used rubbers tucked nicely in glovebox.


F

Also, used rubbers tucked nicely in glovebox


Why do you keep your used rubbers? :confused:

The car is built to be fast, so no complaining that I am doing 90 in a 50.

No complaining that the Northstar is screaming louder than your gf, and sounds better too.

If you must consume a beverage, it must have a lid, and you must use a straw. I assume no responsibility for you tipping your bottle and me hitting a bump at the exact same time.

Do not, at all costs, slam my door. Or I will slam you to the floor.

Keep your shoes off my seats, or I will get on the highway and throw your shoes out the window.

1. Never tell me to slow down except for as a warning that you see a cop ahead. If you are not comfortable going 90+, find another ride.

2. Don't touch my radio. It is my car and my choice of music. If you want it changed, ask me and I may change it for you.

3. Drinks are allowed only if they have a lid and a straw.

4. Do not sit on my hood/trunk or lean on my car. Actually, don't touch the car at all unless opening or closing the door or trunk.

Hand held GPS,no folding,poi's,to many features to list.The manliest of car gadgets.Don't leave home without it!!!!!Yeah, but sometimes it's easier to break open a map to carefully analyze the entire route at once. For work, it's quicker for me to turn the book to whatever town. But I do have a DeLorme Mapping program with GPS receiver. Add a phone card for the laptop and I can google any address or local fire department for a new development.

With regards to air fresheners...stay away. Once you start using them, your car will always smell like something. And if you cake on different smells, you need to keep using a freshener because the residue smell does not go away.

None of my cars have fresheners, I just keep them clean. If you just keep them clean, any temporary odor, including post-Mexican meal gases, goes away.

The 28 Rules of Manhood. There are some car rules included;



1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss's car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
(e) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.



10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever. We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:
"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"
"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!"

We hope this clears up any confusion,

The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

You forgot to add "unless it has a big block or hemi under the hood", Iwould love one of the old lime green challengers dodge made

Only I may eat or drink in it (because it is mine and I said so, that is why!)

Nothing may be left laying around as it may become a projectile in a wreck.

If someone told you my car was dirty, they are more than likely lying.

I don't like anything hanging from the rearview. Blocks my vision.

Don't touch the power antenna

These are just some of the things off the top of my head but the biggest one is this: Don't ever, and I mean ever slam my trunk! If you break that motor or lever I'd go absolutely nuts.

I always keep a map in the car to avoid the embarassment of asking for directions. :)

My bumper stickers go on the rear glass.

Why do you keep your used rubbers? :confused:


Something to toss at the assh0le drivers....I try to splatter them on the front windscreen or bonnet (British words) if possible....


F

Something to toss at the assh0le drivers....I try to splatter them on the front windscreen or bonnet (British words) if possible....


F


HA! thats great! :rofl:

Anyone care to enlighten me about the "sky blue" car?

Is "Light Saphire Metallic Blue" considered sky blue lol

Now that we've established some rules of the road, let's get started on car rules. Again, here are a few of mine:

1) There is absolutely no bumper sticker witty enough to be posted on my car thus maring it's paint forever - Not vote for, not honor student and definitely not some kid pissing on something
2) No bullet holes, I mean c'mon
3) White walls? White walls? Again, c'mon.

Come-on man, not the white wall. Do you mean white wall as opposed to Vogues? Get rid of the white wall, keep the Vogues.:thumbsup:

Parking Permits have to be an exception on the mirror and window sticker..

You have to have whitewalls on a Brougham, That's a law. So really it only needs to be post 1997. Vogues are great but not everyone can spend $250 + per tire.

Vinyl stickers are OK if it says CadillacOwners.com

Nav does not count as a map.

Bumper stickers should be outlawed

Don't touch the power antenna

These are just some of the things off the top of my head but the biggest one is this: Don't ever, and I mean ever slam my trunk! If you break that motor or lever I'd go absolutely nuts.


dang, you beat me to them. i absolutely hate it when people slam the trunk on my buick or cadillac. :tisk: just freaking latch it gently and let it do its work. and the power antenna thing :thehand:

Town Car? :thepan: Oh thanks for waking me up I thought someone said Town Car.

Sorry, but the Town Car L looks much better with whitewalls. My '04 has 'em!

No sex in the car. Something is bound to get damaged. No rubbers, my wife has had her tubes tied for 18 years.

what about keeping your catch rag out of sight...?
Also, used rubbers tucked nicely in glovebox.


F

Something to toss at the assh0le drivers....I try to splatter them on the front windscreen or bonnet (British words) if possible....

F

You must be doing a lot of bambam, since there's a lot of assh0les on the road :D

You must be doing a lot of bambam, since there's a lot of assh0les on the road :D

I do what (whom) I can....


F

my wife has had her tubes tied for 18 years.

Lucky bastard! :worship:

Lucky bastard! :worship:Why? Were your boys disconnected?

Most of these have been said but o well.

1. No comments on my driving (unless positive)
2. Do NOT slam doors, trunks, hoods, or anything else that can open and close.
3. Do not "fling" door handles when using them. Gently allow them to go back in position without a noise.
4. No stickers on the paint.
5. No leaning on/touching the cars exterior.
6. Do not act like an idiot to other drivers or people on/near the road.
7. Treat the car as if it is worth more than your own life.

Anyone care to enlighten me about the "sky blue" car?

Is "Light Saphire Metallic Blue" considered sky blue lol

Sky blue (or as Mopar called it "B-1" blue):
http://dbdartman.moparts.com/pic/babyblue_Etown-2.jpg

Yes, I bought it from a girl, & yes it had a big block!

I forgot one:

No public carwashes, at all.

I agree with almost everything said, so ne reason to post much exept:

Why no brown cars? Ok, I know most cars look like shit when painted brown, but I think '80s RWD Caddys look good in brown metallic. Plus a lot of cars have brown clothtops.

Oh, and if I found an old Mary Kay pink '79 CDV I would TOTALY but it. A real man isin't limited by colors. :cool2:

The most important rule,No Map in car unless your genitals have been removed.

Gotta have maps to make the wife or significant other feel needed on the long hall. Keeps them quite while they are thinking....

Vinyl stickers are OK if it says CadillacOwners.com



Small American Flags need to be allowed. NOT on the paint though.

I violate with the vinyl Red Sox logo on my back window. White and smaller. Looks good to me. It is a Red Sox Nation thing... I may need an amendment for the Boston area.

Small American Flags need to be allowed. NOT on the paint though.


Are you for real? I hate flags on cars, I mean I love the country and all... but to me it just looks tacky having the flag everywhere.

My '83 Coupe Deville had one on the rear window when I bought it, the first thing I did when I got home was rip it off.

Are you for real? I hate flags on cars, I mean I love the country and all... but to me it just looks tacky having the flag everywhere.

My '83 Coupe Deville had one on the rear window when I bought it, the first thing I did when I got home was rip it off.

Yes, absolutely. The magnetic ribbons are a little much, but I think too many Americans take what we have for granted. I wish more people would show our colors with greater pride. To me, it means something when I see a car with the American flag on it. It is one reason why I drive a Cadillac.

LOL I'm doubly luck, but I know it and appreciate it. I get more sex than anyone here. Probably. Well lets just say I get plenty.

Lucky bastard! :worship:

^^ Exactly why!! No reasons why not..."oh well we don't have any rubbers..." I think I am going to get a vasectomy in a few years because I don't want kids anyway. Then me and the wife could go at it anytime.

They had the one-armed guy on the local sports radio station this morning. He said they've filmed 18 total Man Law commercials and the last 9 will be rolled out during football season.

Are you for real? I hate flags on cars, I mean I love the country and all... but to me it just looks tacky having the flag everywhere.

My '83 Coupe Deville had one on the rear window when I bought it, the first thing I did when I got home was rip it off.


Yes I agree. No flags. Patriotism is expressed by actions, not by saluting the flag and hanging/sticking it everywhere, and ESPECIALLY none of those stupid magnetic ribon things. Don't people know that many of those send very little funding to whatever's logo they display?

I agree with no bumper stickers but I did have one on my rear window last presidential election. It read: "Somewhere in Texas a village is missing an idiot", I carefully took it off and it is now on my garage wall. People that go through my garage get a kick out of it. :bouncy:

My fave bumper sticker is (disclaimer: Im not a bible thumper):
Jesus loves you, everyone else thinks youre an as$hole.

F

I agree with no bumper stickers but I did have one on my rear window last presidential election. It read: "Somewhere in Texas a village is missing an idiot", I carefully took it off and it is now on my garage wall. People that go through my garage get a kick out of it. :bouncy:

Are you from Texas? :Poke: :spin:

Are you from Texas? :Poke: :spin:lol.....got me there!:eek:

My fave bumper sticker is (disclaimer: Im not a bible thumper):
Jesus loves you, everyone else thinks youre an as$hole.

FOr...

"Jesus Loves You. He Just Loves Me More!"

lol.....got me there!:eek:

I had a sticker that said "I accelerate for liberals" with a little stick figure of a guy with a peace symbol running. At the time I was working in Cambridge, MA (AKA the Peoples Republic of Cambridge). I had more notes left on my truck about that sticker pissing people off. It was so awesome! :highfive: :2thumbs:

I had a sticker that said "I accelerate for liberals" with a little stick figure of a guy with a peace symbol running. At the time I was working in Cambridge, MA (AKA the Peoples Republic of Cambridge). I had more notes left on my truck about that sticker pissing people off. It was so awesome! :highfive: :2thumbs:


LOL!!!!

I also hate it when people slam my trunklid, that absolutley drives me apeshit, I almost never let anyone else shut it, otherwise I yell at them to do it right! Also, unless you're a beautifiul blonde with big tits and an ass that tastes like french vanilla ice cream, you cannot sit or lean on my car!

LOL!!!!

unless you're a beautifiul blonde with big tits and an ass that tastes like french vanilla ice cream, you cannot sit or lean on my car!

Ass that "tastes like (edit) ice cream".....WOW...Wonder if Baskin/Robins has that flavor as #32 (French Vanilla Ass-cream)


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Yeah, it's special order ;)

I had a sticker that said "I accelerate for liberals" with a little stick figure of a guy with a peace symbol running. At the time I was working in Cambridge, MA (AKA the Peoples Republic of Cambridge). I had more notes left on my truck about that sticker pissing people off. It was so awesome! :highfive: :2thumbs: Yeah peace sucks.

I had a sticker that said "I accelerate for liberals" with a little stick figure of a guy with a peace symbol running. At the time I was working in Cambridge, MA (AKA the Peoples Republic of Cambridge). I had more notes left on my truck about that sticker pissing people off. It was so awesome! :highfive: :2thumbs:

Of course everyone knows about the Hillary Clinton for Prez bumper sticker. It reads; "Run Hillary, run". Democrats put it on their rear bumpers, Republicans put it on their front bumpers!!

Of course everyone knows about the Hillary Clinton for Prez bumper sticker. It reads; "Run Hillary, run". Democrats put it on their rear bumpers, Republicans put it on their front bumpers!!

lol that's pretty goddamn funny!

I had a sticker that said "I accelerate for liberals" with a little stick figure of a guy with a peace symbol running. At the time I was working in Cambridge, MA (AKA the Peoples Republic of Cambridge). I had more notes left on my truck about that sticker pissing people off. It was so awesome! :highfive: :2thumbs:

Of course everyone knows about the Hillary Clinton for Prez bumper sticker. It reads; "Run Hillary, run". Democrats put it on their rear bumpers, Republicans put it on their front bumpers!!

:rofl: :histeric:

Ass that "tastes like (edit) ice cream".....WOW...Wonder if Baskin/Robins has that flavor as #32 (French Vanilla Ass-cream)


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Yes they do. I helped with the research. :highfive: Yet another example of CVP taking one for the team. :thumbsup:

Yes they do. I helped with the research. :highfive: Yet another example of CVP taking one for the team. :thumbsup:

Chris, I hate to ask, but what portion of the research were you "taking one for the team"?? Or should I ask Fannystang??? :tisk: :stirpot:


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