: some good laughs



Mad'lac
03-18-03, 12:52 PM
Situations Hallmark doesn't cover:

1. I always wanted
To have someone to hold,
Someone to love.
After meeting you ... (inside card)
I changed my mind.

2. I must admit,
You brought religion into my life ... (inside card)
I never believed in Hell
Until I met you.

3. As the days go by,
I think how lucky I am ... (inside card)
That you're not here
To ruin it for me.

4. Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go ... (inside card)
Will you take the knife from my back?
You'll probably need it again.

5. Someday I hope to marry ... (inside card)
Someone other than you.

6. Happy birthday!
You look great for your age ... (inside card)
Almost life like!

7. When we were together,
You said you'd die for me.. . (inside card)
Now we've broken up,
I think it's time
To keep your promise.

8. We've been friends for a very long time ... (inside card)
What do you say we stop?

9. I'm so miserable without you .... (inside card)
It's almost like you're still here.

10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?

11. You are such a good friend
If we were on a sinking ship
And there was only one life jacket ... (inside card)
I'd miss you terribly
And think of you often.

12. Your friends and I wanted
to do something really special
for your birthday... (inside card)
So we're having you put to sleep.

13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, Kentucky,and West Virginia.)

14. Looking back o'er the years
We've been together,
I can't help but wonder ... (inside card)
What was I thinking?

15. Congratulations on your wedding day!. . .. (inside card)
Too bad no one likes your husband.

16. How could two people as beautiful as you ... (inside card)
Have such an ugly baby?

kcnewell
03-18-03, 02:32 PM
Funny stuff! I like it!

JerseyGirl
03-18-03, 02:48 PM
Ahahahaha....that was great! Now i gotta save that! :)

Allante North *
03-18-03, 05:52 PM
Hey mad'lac,

I'm almost offended that Tennessee was not included in number 13, but I guess the influx of Damn Yankees has bumped us down the list. Keep up the good work, and try to add some pic's to the captions next time.

rek
03-18-03, 06:19 PM
A Hollywood producer wanted to do a trilogy of great composers, but with an unusual twist. He wanted the lead roles to be played by some of Hollywoods muscle men. He contacted Vandamme and asked who he would like to be...Vandamme said Motzart. He then asked Stallone who he wanted to be...Stallone said Chopan. He asked Arnold who he wanted to be...Arnold said..I'll be Bach!!!:cool: