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19K views 60 replies 28 participants last post by  Cougar281 
#1 ·
Seriously, what a worthless animal, and hardly a dog. Our neighbors have a pair of white ones that use our yard EXCLUSIVELY as their toilet. Never seen them crap on the neighbor's lawn, but ours is apparently the dumping ground of preference.

Sometimes if I leave the garage open, they'll rip open garbage sacks and chew on our golf bags. Whats worse is they aren't even afraid of us. I can yell, jump, stomp, and even spray the hose and they'll continue to stand there BARKING as if I'm on THEIR turf. Little *****s.

Now, lets say there's this clumsy brown guy, we'll call him Wesda, who always uses a silver Razor Scooter to go out and get the mail. Lets say Wesda hits a bump in the driveway, flies forward five feet, and lands on his side. If Wesda's neighbors had a labrador, it would come over and check on him out of genuine concern, licking his face as he moans in agony, then alerting his owner about the situation. But no, WESDA'S NEIGHBORS HAVE STUPID FARKING POODLES.

The two little *****s ran over and barked at me like I just fell on their sacred grounds. One started chewing on the cuff of my jeans while the other, less than two feet from my face, barked in my left ear. The neighbors, who were spiffily dressed and getting into a white Lincoln limousine, casually sauntered over and asked if I was okay and shooed their dogs.

If those two worthless cottonballs want war, ITS ON! Dont blame me if I accidentally spill antifreeze in the street.
 
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#5 ·
I heard Stuart Hamblen tell a story about living next door to John Wayne.

Wayne’s little Hispanic wife had a little toy poodle who liked to tear up Hamblen’s wife’s flower garden. One day Hamblen had enough and shot the little beast with his BB gun. The pooch yapped all the way home, Wayne’s wife came over to chew Hamblen out saying; “You jes wait till de Duke get home, he gonna take care ob you!”

Wayne comes home that evening and doesn’t get half way up the walk before his wife comes out yelling and gesturing her story. Wayne saunters over to Hamblen’s house, knocks on the door, Hamblen opens it;

“Evenin Stuart.”

“Hello John.”

“You shoot my dog with a BB gun?”

“Yup.”

“Whatsamatter, don’t you have a shotgun?”
 
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#8 ·
My wife has a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, its a small dog, but they are very well natured, when we walk her, we often see a poodle, and it is very aggressive towards us and our dog, but my three Gordon Setters deal with this well.

I have a suggestion, every time one of the dogs shits in your lawn, shovel it into a brown paper bag, go knock on the neighbours door and drop it in the hall.

We had neighbours who had cats that used to shit in our gravel driveway, i told him if his cats shit in my drive he had better pick it up. I did this, and from then on he did, well, until i went outside one morning to find his cats on the cage of my son's rabbit. The rabbit was dead, it was petrified. His cats died that day too.
 
#10 ·
Get a pooper scooper and fling the shit back onto their driveway every time. Dogs should be fenced or supervised. Turn the hose on them if they get after you.

I had a poodle growing up and he was nothing like that at all. Just a good-natured dog who loved everybody.
 
#13 ·
Rolex said:
I recommend ice cubes and a sling shot. :sneaky:
ETA: the evidence melts away.
Speaking of using ice as ammo.

I remember seeing a movie when I was a kid. An assasin is on a rooftop, target is coming in a limo down the street.

Assassin puts together his sniper rifle, complete with scope.

Limo stops in front of building.

Assassin opens an insulated little case and inside are two bullets made of ICE attached to two brass shells.

Assassin takes out bullets, loads rifle.

Target gets out of limo and begins to walk into hotel.

Assassin lines up target in scope and pulls trigger....and fires again.

Target hits the ground, dead.

Assassin packs up and leaves in a big hurry.

Bullets cannot be traced since they melt in a few minutes and cannot be traced to the gun that fired it.

Interesting....would an ice bullet even make it out of the barrel? Maybe, if it was insulated enough from the burning powder.

I know this is in the realm of science fiction, but it would be interesting to think about. Not the assassination part, but the ballistics part.

Hmmmm.....
 
#14 ·
Hi Everyone:

The owners warrant the most blameworthiness,
and sound like A**holes for permitting the
ongoing problems.
Nonetheless, as HRS mentioned poodles
are French. ...
Consequently, they are more likely to
offend and annoy.
Nonetheless, the French do drink and dine well.
Speaking of food; Jesda should kidnap the little
bastards; and, tie them up in front of a Korean
Restaurant. Drop by the next day and see if
some semblance of 'Poodles with Noodles' is the
special on the menu.:thepan:

Best Regards,

TomDeville:cool2:
:cool2: :cool2:
 
#16 ·
thu said:
Speaking of using ice as ammo.
I remember seeing a movie when I was a kid. An assasin is on a rooftop, target is coming in a limo down the street.
Assassin puts together his sniper rifle, complete with scope.
Limo stops in front of building.
Assassin opens an insulated little case and inside are two bullets made of ICE attached to two brass shells.
Assassin takes out bullets, loads rifle.
Target gets out of limo and begins to walk into hotel.
Assassin lines up target in scope and pulls trigger....and fires again.
Target hits the ground, dead.
Assassin packs up and leaves in a big hurry.
Bullets cannot be traced since they melt in a few minutes and cannot be traced to the gun that fired it.
Interesting....would an ice bullet even make it out of the barrel? Maybe, if it was insulated enough from the burning powder.
I know this is in the realm of science fiction, but it would be interesting to think about. Not the assassination part, but the ballistics part.
Hmmmm.....
:lildevil:
 
#19 ·
They might have it on their website, which I havent ever visited. I cant recall clearly if the problem was with the bullets themselves not being able to hold together properly, or if they were just shattering on impact and not getting beyond about the first layer of skin, but they did say it was busted.
 
#21 ·
Krashed989 said:
Yeah I saw that episode. They even tried it with a frozen peice of meat, and that worked a little better than the ice bullet, but the ice bullet shattered into a mist as it left the barrel, or broke shortly after freezing it. Myth Busted!
That would make sense. If a sniper bullet travels at more than 3000 ft/sec, you'd have some pretty tremendous heating due to air friction and from contact with the barrel.

Adding a sabot around the ice bullet to prevent contact with the barrel might help, but as soon as it hit the air and the sabot fell away, you'd have some pretty good heating.
 
#27 ·
mccombie_5 said:
Oh no i see a cat lover
What if i sent my dog to shit in your driveway :p and what if it accidentally eats your cat? :halo: :lildevil:

j/k Dope!
I'd have to then show you the last thing your dog would ever see....



Haha, of course, J/K. I hit a dog with my Lincoln one night....I felt awful....Worst part was, I only hit it's head...with the bumper.....Everything else I missed......
 
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