: I am a victim of theft!



Stoneage_Caddy
01-07-05, 10:43 AM
First off , once again the caddy is doing fine , resting out (way out) in the parkinglot.

Now , where i work i have a nice little cube . Not large but good enough that it allowed me to "personalize it" with the style of a Cadillac owner and a ameture comediean . Among these items was a can of SPAM . Wenesday i arrived to work to find my can of SPAM was not where it is supposed to be (on my monitior). In fact it was GONE !!!! Normally i would be mad to find something stolen. But this time im just plain confused . Who would steal this foul substance that traces its origins back to the 1950s? Possible suspects included a hostile vegetarian liberal that is a freind of mine. He was immediately interviewed by me and was informed of the current reward of tofu to any vegitarian with information on the whereabouts of my can of SPAM. I was also posting a reward of a steak to anyone who stole the can of SPAM from my desk. Not for the return of the substance but rather out of pity that someone would eat this stuff.

So far the spam is still missing

heres a photo of the substance:http://www.spamgift.com/images/spamgift/products/6119.jpg

Elvis
01-07-05, 11:04 AM
May I offer any assistance? I am highly trained and experienced in matters of national security.

EDIT: Sorry if the damn picture won't load. It was taken after one of my great military victories. Maybe it will load later.

EDIT AGAIN: Or, I could just attach it here!

juiceE
01-07-05, 11:58 AM
Hey Stoneage...obviously Sumone Doesn't Like U In The Offc. Watch Out... It'll Get Worse

Stoneage_Caddy
01-07-05, 12:00 PM
i loaded it off my email reminder ...that dillo gets bigger every time...

this might me a matter of national security ...SPAM falling into terrorist hands could force an attack like no have ever seen after they taste that crap ..

Stoneage_Caddy
01-07-05, 12:04 PM
Hey Stoneage...obviously Sumone Doesn't Like U In The Offc. Watch Out... It'll Get Worse

good point , could this be a prempeitve attack on the land ? Maybe ill form an inter office terrorisim task force

as my first order of busness im changeing us to a orange alert !!!!

Elvis
01-07-05, 12:07 PM
We stand ready and on alert. Issue the order and we'll deploy.

Stoneage_Caddy
01-07-05, 12:15 PM
Copy that .

We will continue to monitor the situation ...

When any of the 3 scale cadillacs turn up missing we will give the order ....

klebrun
01-07-05, 12:54 PM
Perhaps terrorists are testing a new way of cleverly packaging a dirty bomb. :suspect:

illumina
01-07-05, 01:47 PM
isn't spam made from the rendered-meat from the dog pound and cat ward?

Stoneage_Caddy
01-07-05, 01:50 PM
I always thought it was a early form of insullation NASA made for the mercury and gemini spacecraft . They must have found out it was ediable only by those without tastebuds and properly working stomachs.

"S"pacecraft "P"rotective "A"lloy "M"aterial

brougham
01-07-05, 04:14 PM
They changed the way it opens? NOOOOOOOO!!! That twisty handle was so cool! :crying2:

Ralph
01-07-05, 04:32 PM
Hey Brougham, isn't it called "Prem" up here?

Stoney: Your northern allies are prepared and have been made ready for swift, decisive action should the call be heeded our way. I've packed lots of bacon and Anne Murray cd's for everyone's listening pleasure! The sleigh dog teams have been fed lots of spam, and are ready, but for some strange, unexplicable reason, they have fallen ill due to a stomach flu or something.

Uh, we may have to hitch a ride from the British or Russians to get down there and help find the evil dooer after all. :hide: But we'll get there! We'll let the French do all the dirty work first. :sneaky:

Vesicant
01-07-05, 04:53 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v125/MrHaun/nte.bmpAnne Murray - Snowbird http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v125/MrHaun/nte.bmp

:bling:

Stoneage_Caddy
01-07-05, 05:06 PM
Anne Murray cd's for everyone's listening pleasure

According to the geniva conventions this weapon cannot be used ....But my counter SPAM theft taskforce are interested in the weapon for use in a Grenada style psycologial assault on the evildoer ...

Ralph
01-07-05, 05:08 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v125/MrHaun/nte.bmpAnne Murray - Snowbird http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v125/MrHaun/nte.bmp

:bling:



Snowbirds? :sneaky:


Stoney, you're correct. It was deemed cruel and unusual punnishment to play Annes' music on the loud speaker where you work, as it would horrify the innocents as well! :shhh:

davesdeville
01-07-05, 06:16 PM
Whoever stole it must hate freedom.

evilrussian
01-07-05, 08:16 PM
That anti-spam legislation must be kicking in. :suspect:

AceKool
01-09-05, 11:47 AM
In the Hawaiian Islands, a can of Spam is like a Krugerand here in the Mainland.
Anyone in your office planning a trip to the islands?

It won't do any good to report it to the police unless you planned ahead and etched your SSN on the bottom of the can or had a Lojack-type device inserted inside the can.

It is a mean-spirted world we live in when something like this can happen.

Sinister Angel
01-09-05, 02:25 PM
Viper 11 to Apache 24, we are currently searching for the target. Let us know when you need a fire mission, over.

evilrussian
01-09-05, 02:39 PM
We have to get michael moore on this case... The sequel Spamenhite 911.

Stoneage_Caddy
01-09-05, 08:56 PM
In the Hawaiian Islands, a can of Spam is like a Krugerand here in the Mainland.
Anyone in your office planning a trip to the islands?

It won't do any good to report it to the police unless you planned ahead and etched your SSN on the bottom of the can or had a Lojack-type device inserted inside the can.

It is a mean-spirted world we live in when something like this can happen.

yes i did think ahead , but the perp somehow defeated the lojack system ..sick sick world we live in .....they left my caddy but stole my spam ...i mean what person would choose spam over a caddy ?