: A few things guys should know about women...definitions



ChristianV
08-16-04, 11:46 PM
Here's a few things I picked up along the way. Thought maybe you guys might get a kick out of this...

*_FINE_*
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

*_FIVE MINUTES_*
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

*_NOTHING_*
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine"

*_GO AHEAD_*
This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

*_LOUD SIGH_*
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"

*_THAT'S OKAY_*
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

*_THANKS_*
A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.

illumina
08-17-04, 12:03 AM
what would the term "whatever" mean??? my ex (insert ungodly winch here) girlfriend used that all the time. BTW, nice freakin' car bro!!! :worship:

majax
08-17-04, 12:39 AM
how about "I'm not ready"?

Ralph
08-17-04, 04:33 AM
I still don't know how to answer to "Am I getting fat?" If you say "no" they don't believe you and want to spend 20 minutes analyzing the fact! I usually end up saying "of course not smoopy, you're as pretty as the day I met you." :rolleyes2

"What do you mean by that?!" Another classic that you will find your self in and can't easily walk away from I've found. If you get angry and go work on the car for awhile, and then come back before it's resolved, it's only going to be worse, so resolve the issue! :drinker

"Why do you like Natasha so much?! My response= "because she reminds me so much of you" :helpless:

I probably got more, to be continued...

majax
08-17-04, 05:41 AM
my mom usually asks me the "do I look fat" and usually I just say yes and she drops the whole thing. But then my dad gets kinda mad at me...

T_Dogg8
08-17-04, 08:32 AM
I still don't know how to answer to "Am I getting fat?" If you say "no" they don't believe you and want to spend 20 minutes analyzing the fact! I usually end up saying "of course not smoopy, you're as pretty as the day I met you." :rolleyes2

"What do you mean by that?!" Another classic that you will find your self in and can't easily walk away from I've found. If you get angry and go work on the car for awhile, and then come back before it's resolved, it's only going to be worse, so resolve the issue! :drinker:

been there and done all that. why do they ask us questions they don't want to know the answers too?? and then get mad if we just give them the answer they want to hear??

PurpleDeville
08-17-04, 12:28 PM
LOL LOL ok guys! i will have to agree with most, well all of those statements posted above. pretty much everything said is very true! except for one, the go ahead one! i am a very easy going person and if my boyfriend wants to go hang out with the guys then go right ahead, i wouldnt get mad at all. but that means that it would go the same for me, and if it didnt then the above comes into affect and if he didnt like it, OH WELL!

lev
08-17-04, 01:20 PM
Ralph, you need to copy all of this thread and paste it into "Bah.Women" thread.

Just a suggestion.

Stoneage_Caddy
08-17-04, 03:40 PM
"We should go out and eat sometime " - She means , "im tired of buying dinner i want to use you for a change , i have a pool boy for what you think i want"

"God i hate my boyfreind so much "- She means -" I saw you have kleenex written on your forehead so im gonna cry on you and go back to my awful boyfreind who beats me even after you kicked his arse."

when she looks into your eyes and smiles this means "Your gonna get the check right ?"

"I love you" - This means " You have become quite useful "

"Do i look sexy in this ?" - this means "Your best freind is hot and i want him"

Ralph
08-17-04, 08:51 PM
my mom usually asks me the "do I look fat" and usually I just say yes and she drops the whole thing. But then my dad gets kinda mad at me...

That's not nice LOL!

RBraczyk
08-17-04, 09:20 PM
Yea ralph, but it works... :lildevil:

Ralph
08-17-04, 10:31 PM
Yea ralph, but it works... :lildevil:

Not when you got the imprint of an army boot on your a.....a...a hey How's it going, eh. :hide: Nice weather... :shhh:

ChristianV
08-18-04, 12:02 AM
@illumina. Thanks for the compliments on my 73! She's my baby all right. I treat that car better than myself sometimes. LOL

I used to think honesty was the best policy when I was younger. In the past if my girl would ask me "do these jeans make me look fat." I'd usually answer "no, it's your a$$ which makes you look fat." I've since wisened up. A response like that would result in a night on the couch or worse yet, outside in the doghouse. So guys, LIE. Or just change the topic. :lildevil:

illumina
08-18-04, 12:11 AM
i like eddie murphys philosophy best: deney everything.

girl: was that you i seen at that bitches house???
guy: nope.
girl: i know it was you!!!!
guy: was'nt me.
girl: you mean you werent there at the skanks???
guy: nope.
girl: sorry, i love you baby.
guy: love you too... :lies:

T_Dogg8
08-18-04, 08:51 AM
if you're good at other things you can usually make her forget really quickly. if that doesn't work, suggest a girl show on lifetime or something. it's not much fun, but at least you live to see another day.

ChristianV
08-18-04, 09:55 AM
@T_Dogg. Lol good one. Or maybe go out and rent "Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya sisterhood" and a bring home boquet of daisies. :worship:

T_Dogg8
08-18-04, 11:37 AM
@T_Dogg. Lol good one. Or maybe go out and rent "Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya sisterhood" and a bring home boquet of daisies. :worship:
ok now, we don't need to go overboard :) i think i'd rather get yelled at for 10 min then watch that movie.

Ralph
08-18-04, 02:44 PM
BAH...you guys got off easy! Here's some of the movies I've had to sit through/or buy: Dying Young
First Knight
Ever After
Fried Green Tomatoes.

More:

"Why did you look at her that way? Do you want to DATE her or something??!!" Smart answer="Oh NO honey, I'm just looking to compare how INFERIOR ALL other women are to YOU."

My answer="Ahhhh, no. :hmm: "


"Why don't you ever let me have the remote for the TV?" Smart answer="I'm sorry smoopy, you are the boss, and my supreme master and commander :worship: here you go honey (hands remote to watch stupid girlie show) :rant2:

My answer= "because since the dawn of time, MEN have had the power, fought in wars and been in charge." :suspect: SLAP! :crying:


"You spend so much time waxing and maintaining that Cadillac, why don't you wax mine?!" Smart answer="right away dear, I won't bother with that oil change that I desperately need because your 25 year old car has some bugs on the windshield, and needs a wax."

My answer="I waxed that car for 15 years, I'm sick of it." :devil:

What do you think Purple D. am I on the ball? :p

ChristianV
08-18-04, 02:53 PM
@Ralph. Nice. Here's another one I often hear and I'm sure you might have dealt with this one. "Why do you get to park your car in the garage? Mine's NEWER." The polite response, "Yes dear. I'll go move it right now." My response, "Cause you drive a 96 Mazda PROTEGE and I drive a Cadillac. Nuff said."

BTW, I hate all of the movies you mentioned above. Especially "Ever After." Here's a couple others.

Steel Magnolias
The Sweetest Thing
and the ULTIMATE chick flick, Pretty Woman!!!

Ralph
08-18-04, 03:00 PM
@Ralph. Nice. Here's another one I often hear and I'm sure you might have dealt with this one. "Why do you get to park your car in the garage? Mine's NEWER." The polite response, "Yes dear. I'll go move it right now." My response, "Cause you drive a 96 Mazda PROTEGE and I drive a Cadillac. Nuff said."

BTW, I hate all of the movies you mentioned above. Especially "Ever After." Here's a couple others.

Steel Magnolias
The Sweetest Thing
and the ULTIMATE chick flick, Pretty Woman!!!

LOL! Well, then you are more brave than me my friend. ;) I had to deal with that old car, new car/garage issue with my StepDad. My old cars were in better shape than his newer ones.

I didn't mind "The Sweetest Thing" I guess I'm still in love with Christina Aplelgate. :D

Elvis
08-18-04, 04:53 PM
BAH...you guys got off easy! Here's some of the movies I've had to sit through/or buy: Dying Young
First Knight
Ever After
Fried Green Tomatoes.



You got off easy. Fried Green Tomatoes was actually not that bad.

Try sitting through:

The Shadowlands

Remains of the Day

Six Degrees of Separation

Like Water for Chocolate

The Age of Innocence

The Crying Game


The things a single man will do for an easy piece...

T_Dogg8
08-19-04, 08:13 AM
or try mona lisa's smile

the notebook

sweet home alabama

and some other girl movie where the main girl character dies.

luckily most of those movies have attractive girls in them to look at :)

what i don't like is when i get roped into shows like wedding story and crap like that.

ChristianV
08-19-04, 10:03 AM
Gentlemen, Those are excellent, excellent examples of movies which exemplify "chickness."

Just as an update, last week I had to sit through "Sex and the City Season 3" and "13 going on 30." BUT in exchange my wife sat through "Kill Bill 2" with me so all in all I like to think it was an even exchange. :D

Ralph
08-19-04, 02:19 PM
Gentlemen, Those are excellent, excellent examples of movies which exemplify "chickness."

Just as an update, last week I had to sit through "Sex and the City Season 3" and "13 going on 30." BUT in exchange my wife sat through "Kill Bill 2" with me so all in all I like to think it was an even exchange. :D

Some girls dig movie violence though. My girlfriend 10 years ago loved that show "Natural Born Killers" (Tarentino's first written work I've heard) I was kinda freaked that she digged it, and after that I watched my back around her. :p (She would laugh at all the violent scenes. :suspense: ) Now I just hear "Eeeewww, how can you guys watch that, it's all blood and gore?!" I usually try justifying it by saying "that's the real world for ya baby." :rolleyes: I'm crude sometimes.

I also didn't much care for sitting through "Princess Diaries" or the "Scooby Doo" movie. :annoyed:

T_Dogg8
08-19-04, 02:44 PM
hey hold on there ralph. don't start bad mouthing scooby :want: just because the movie sucked compared to the cartoon, doesn't mean you can badmouth the scoob. :want: :want: :want:

Ralph
08-19-04, 02:51 PM
hey hold on there ralph. don't start bad mouthing scooby :want: just because the movie sucked compared to the cartoon, doesn't mean you can badmouth the scoob. :want: :want: :want:

LOL, well it's not my style unless there is a car chase or a shoot-out. :) Girls of all ages seem to like that movie. Velma looked ok to me. ;)

T_Dogg8
08-19-04, 02:52 PM
that's true and daphine too.

Ralph
08-19-04, 03:05 PM
been there and done all that. why do they ask us questions they don't want to know the answers too?? and then get mad if we just give them the answer they want to hear??

If I knew the answer to that, I'd be rich from selling my best selling novel entitled "Women, We've Finally Figured Them Out." :woohoo:

tru504187211
08-19-04, 03:18 PM
I guess the only thing I can say is at this point would be...when she pisses me off...I just get some numbers to ease the pain. With those numbers you will either see how good you've got it with, insert name here, or find somebody better with thoses numbers...IMPOSSIBLE TO GO WRONG!

Elvis
08-19-04, 04:28 PM
My wife doesn't understand my sudden desire to catch up on past seasons of "The Sopranos." I only got to see part of the first season before she talked me into canceling HBO. Now I'm picking up DVDs on eBay for $30 a set. Season #4 should be arriving any day now...

T_Dogg8
08-19-04, 04:42 PM
My wife doesn't understand my sudden desire to catch up on past seasons of "The Sopranos." I only got to see part of the first season before she talked me into canceling HBO. Now I'm picking up DVDs on eBay for $30 a set. Season #4 should be arriving any day now...
great show.

T_Dogg8
08-19-04, 04:43 PM
I guess the only thing I can say is at this point would be...when she pisses me off...I just get some numbers to ease the pain. With those numbers you will either see how good you've got it with, insert name here, or find somebody better with thoses numbers...IMPOSSIBLE TO GO WRONG!
i know i have it pretty good. just sometimes anyone would piss you off.

ChristianV
08-19-04, 05:26 PM
Sopranos -- GREAT show...and getting BETTER.

Luckily my wife is a Soprano's freak and she watches it with me every week. In return I watch Six Feet Under with her, which at first I didn't really care for but let me tell you this show GROWS on you. I'm hooked now.

Elvis
08-19-04, 06:09 PM
I've read some good things about "Six Feet Under" but I've never seen an episode. I'm absolutely hooked on The Sopranos right now. I heard the sixth season won't air until 2006, and they don't know when the 5th season will be out on DVD.

illumina
08-19-04, 06:35 PM
You got off easy. Fried Green Tomatoes was actually not that bad.

Try sitting through:

The Shadowlands

Remains of the Day

Six Degrees of Separation

Like Water for Chocolate

The Age of Innocence

The Crying Game


The things a single man will do for an easy piece...



try the english patient!!! :vomit:
i had to sit through that. even though it came out some time ago, the X still loved it.
reminded me of an episode of seinfeld when i seen that "masterpeice".

T_Dogg8
08-20-04, 08:13 AM
I've read some good things about "Six Feet Under" but I've never seen an episode. I'm absolutely hooked on The Sopranos right now. I heard the sixth season won't air until 2006, and they don't know when the 5th season will be out on DVD.
yeah.....HBO and the actors both got greedy and it's almost killed the show. it's a shame. it's like they didn't care about the people who watch the show, just how much goes in their pocket.

ChristianV
08-20-04, 09:47 AM
@TDogg. The funniest thing about the whole Soprano's fiasco, and don't get me wrong the cast is stellar and VERY talented, but I don't see any of their solo projects going anywhere. Jamie Lynn Stiegler's music career is all but dead. James Galdofini's solo projects have all failed dismally. I think a lot of the casts careers might end with the show. Or they'll just forever be typecast as wiseguys.

So in light of this, it pisses me off that some of their ego's have gotten so out of hand that it's affecting production of what I would call the best show on television, in my humble opinion.

Back to the topic, just the other day I had to sit through "The Hours." :rolleyes2 Not to be confused with Nicole Kidman's other movie, "The Others."

Stoneage_Caddy
08-20-04, 10:14 AM
Glad im not dateing look at this pile of crap some of you will have to endure sober :
http://www2.foxsearchlight.com/gardenstate/

Ive seen the commercial for it 6 times now and i still have no clue what it is about

T_Dogg8
08-20-04, 10:26 AM
@TDogg. The funniest thing about the whole Soprano's fiasco, and don't get me wrong the cast is stellar and VERY talented, but I don't see any of their solo projects going anywhere. Jamie Lynn Stiegler's music career is all but dead. James Galdofini's solo projects have all failed dismally. I think a lot of the casts careers might end with the show. Or they'll just forever be typecast as wiseguys.

So in light of this, it pisses me off that some of their ego's have gotten so out of hand that it's affecting production of what I would call the best show on television, in my humble opinion.

Back to the topic, just the other day I had to sit through "The Hours." :rolleyes2 Not to be confused with Nicole Kidman's other movie, "The Others."
i know what you mean. it's like they're shooting themselves in the foot and don't even realize it.

Ralph
04-30-05, 05:16 PM
LEV!!! You forgot to revive this one!!! :D

addison_ii
04-30-05, 05:45 PM
Here's a few things I picked up along the way. Thought maybe you guys might get a kick out of this...
*_FINE_*
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
*_FIVE MINUTES_*
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
*_NOTHING_*
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine"
*_GO AHEAD_*
This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.
*_LOUD SIGH_*
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"
*_THAT'S OKAY_*
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
*_THANKS_*
A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.
Along with those add:
Do not answer any question about their weight.
Do not answer any questions about ex.
Try to answer question of a delicate nature with a question ie: Do these jeans make me look fat? Do you think they make you look fat? No, I don't think so. (officially off the hot seat now)Well there you go.
Do the opposite of what they say: I don't want anything for my birthday(Buy something immediately)
Remember all dates of importance to them(first kiss,etc)if you stay together long enough, they will ask for dates and details years later. Buying an electronic organizer will help in this regard.

* She who must be obeyed doesn't really have to be obeyed just make them think they are.:lildevil: