: Took a ride on the failboat tonight! or How an Escalade ended up in a drainage ditch.



Jesda
11-16-08, 03:31 AM
http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35002-5/DCP_3230.JPG

My camera doesn't take very good night photos, so you'll have to rely on the story. We were driving up the road to get some pizza at a place we had never been to.

Ian turned left behind the shopping plaza (which was mostly a GIGANTIC 24-hour fitness center) into a new housing development. We tried to go around the back of the building but ended up running into a barrier. He tried to drive around it but ended up getting the rear wheels stuck (its a 2WD Escalade).

Well, it was stuck. He went to the gym to use their phone. Neither of us brought our cell phones and for some reason we forgot about Onstar.

Finally, I got bored of waiting and tried to back the Escalade down and then to the side, thinking the momentum from going into the ditch would help me bring the rear end up and on to the street.

Instead, it just slid down to the bottom and stayed there.

I tried to call Onstar, but before they could dispatch the battery died.

My shoes were ruined by mud and the Cadillac was completely filthy.

The tow guy was really nice. It cost $175 to winch it out about 75 feet and he was quick and efficient. He chained a hook to the side of his truck (a Ford commercial-grade service vehicle) and dragged the Escalade out while I steered.

We thought about cheaper alternative options but decided we should pay up and get it out of there before the cops discovered the land we destroyed.



http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35006-4/DCP_3231.JPG

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35009-5/DCP_3232.JPG

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35012-5/DCP_3233.JPG
During the drag-out the Cadillac almost went over a transformer. I honked before that happened.

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35015-5/DCP_3234.JPG

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35018-5/DCP_3235.JPG

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35022-2/DCP_3237.JPG

They were apparently trying to grow some grass there, but it has been destroyed. It looks as if some kids went four-wheeling.

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35048-2/DCP_3238a.JPG

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35051-2/DCP_3239a.JPG

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/35054-2/DCP_3240a.JPG

Drove it home, leaving a trail of mud behind it, and parked. Tomorrow it's getting a wash and detail.

The tow guy said he would be taking pics to put on his wall of shame.

urbanski
11-16-08, 07:22 AM
http://i113.photobucket.com/albums/n201/therealurbanski/1169596536957.jpg

parexa
11-16-08, 09:27 AM
You aint got twenty sixes. fail.

Destroyer
11-16-08, 09:55 AM
See what food addictions can do?. :D

Rolex
11-16-08, 10:29 AM
Thanks for sharing your fail with the group. AWD Escalades FTW!

slk230mb
11-16-08, 11:39 AM
Did you guys ever get to eat?

You need to go back to the scene of the FAIL and get some pics in daylight :)

Also, AWD Escalades FTW ;)

eyekandyboats.inc
11-16-08, 11:56 AM
daylight photos!!!!
be sure you clean off your lade first

"G$"
11-16-08, 12:38 PM
You aint got twenty sixes. fail.



accident prone or is it just me?

urbanski
11-16-08, 12:48 PM
http://media.g4tv.com/images/blog/2007/11/27/633317514784490542.jpg

urbanski
11-16-08, 12:49 PM
http://neatorama.cachefly.net/images/2008-01/shipment-of-fail.jpg

urbanski
11-16-08, 12:54 PM
http://i168.photobucket.com/albums/u172/heffernan_ca/fail/Fail15-1.jpg

I~LUV~Caddys8792
11-16-08, 03:03 PM
Do you and Ian purposely try to wreck your Cadillacs? :cynic:

Rolex
11-16-08, 03:25 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/rolex/shipoffailcl4.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/rolex/fail-1.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/rolex/1132818810440.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/rolex/fail.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/rolex/youlose5qz.gif
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/rolex/Boo-Yah.gif

ted tcb
11-16-08, 03:26 PM
Too bad you didn't have the Rangerover with you.

thebigjimsho
11-16-08, 04:22 PM
Thank you for continuing the stereotype of the typical Escalade owner...:duck:

dkozloski
11-16-08, 04:46 PM
I saw an old rerun of "True Stories of the Highway Patrol" last night that was eerily similar to your experience. The blue Suburban they'd stolen was buried to the rear doors in the mud. The perps were 12 and 15 years of age. I'd be rethinking the projected roadmap of my life if I were you.

blue07cts
11-16-08, 05:36 PM
http://i77.photobucket.com/albums/j73/bloodloverchick/Snake_fail.jpg

http://i148.photobucket.com/albums/s24/Necromancer-Nyra/Fail/wire_fail.jpg

77CDV
11-16-08, 07:50 PM
That's it, Ian is not allowed near any more Cadillacs. He's just too darn dangerous! ;)

Florian
11-16-08, 09:09 PM
youre both 'tards



F

LS1Mike
11-16-08, 11:42 PM
http://www.ratemyeverything.net/image/7731/0/Dog_FAIL.ashx
Damn dude, you have the worst luck ever.
Do you by chance have a bike?

Aron9000
11-17-08, 12:06 AM
http://buffalopundit.wnymedia.net/blogs/files/2007/10/fail.jpg

93DevilleUSMC
11-17-08, 07:42 AM
Given that Jesda and Ian seem to be uninjured, I guess the humor is safely warranted. That said, the U.S. should solve a major problem in the Middle East by hiring Jesda as Ahmadinejad's limo driver.

dirt_cheap_fleetwood
11-17-08, 10:11 AM
Damn, I wanna go there. There are NO good mudding places around here and I just bought me a Rodeo that is way to clean for having mud tires. :)

Jesda
11-17-08, 12:35 PM
You guys are missing the most tragic part: Pizza was not gotten. :( :( :(

danbuc
11-17-08, 12:44 PM
No Pizza......Exxon Fail-dize indeed....

You will now be known as Captain Hazlewood....

77CDV
11-17-08, 02:27 PM
You guys are missing the most tragic part: Pizza was not gotten. :( :( :(

Congratulations, you have now entered Epic Fail Land. Your Edsel filled with a year's supply of NewCoke is waiting.:yup:

gary88
11-17-08, 03:19 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v222/gheb88/faceplant-dive.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v222/gheb88/FAIL_McBride.jpg

Night Wolf
11-17-08, 04:30 PM
Sweet... the proper use for a truck-based SUV :)

I~LUV~Caddys8792
11-17-08, 04:51 PM
You guys are missing the most tragic part: Pizza was not gotten. :( :( :(


****ing a man....****ing a...

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse.... :nono: :(

dirt_cheap_fleetwood
11-17-08, 05:31 PM
You guys are missing the most tragic part: Pizza was not gotten. :( :( :(

Bacon Pizza?

urbanski
11-17-08, 06:30 PM
no bacon
no pizza
fail jesda is fail

I~LUV~Caddys8792
11-17-08, 10:39 PM
no bacon
no pizza
fail jesda is fail

And no George Michael!

Triple fail!

Jesda
11-17-08, 11:43 PM
'I'm never gonna drive again.'

Jesda
11-18-08, 12:27 AM
http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/36273-1/SSPX0579.jpg

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/36276-2/SSPX0580.jpg

http://www.q45.org/gallery2/d/36279-2/SSPX0581.jpg

Went back to the scene. What a mess!

Destroyer
11-18-08, 12:30 AM
Car killers! :) Public transportation is always an option.............