: A Playa has 4 different types of girls...

06-18-07, 01:02 PM
Just got this in an email, thought it was kinda funny... Messed up but funny

1. Wifey
2. Baby Girl
3. Side Piece
4. Jump Off


1) Wifey is the sexiest, most successful and most respected of all the women. She is loved, needed and wanted by her man...she is VIRTUALLY IRREPLACEABLE. She is the girl that the guy loves and will always love, he never wants to see her with another man...BUT he will cheat on her with Baby Girl until he is mature enough to realize that if he gets caught or ****s up in any way and loses Wifey, he would be screwed, and NEVER be happy again. Wifey gets along with mom, is independent, never nags, loves to dress sexy for her man, can cook and loves to keep a clean house. Wifey gets called 5 or 6 times a day. Drawback of Wifey, she loves public displays of affection...which might interfere with the acquisition of a Side Piece.

Link edited out ~ Rolex

2) Baby Girlis ALWAYS just as hot as wifey and usually has a very active social life...she IS replaceable, thinks she's the next Wifey, but will only be Wifey if an extreme disaster takes place. Baby Girl gets some of the benefits of Wifey, like quality time every now and then and even presents on birthdays and holidays, but that's as far as it goes. The main reason to have Baby Girl is in case Wife really really ****s up, she can be replaced in a matter of weeks because Baby Girl has been groomed to slip right into her spot. Be careful of Baby Girl, she tends to be just as attached as Wifey and therefore can be dangerous to the Side Piece. Biggest benefit of Baby Girl...she is extremely private and hates causing a scene, baby girl can come into the same restaurant as you and wifey and wifey will have no idea you two even know each other. Baby Girl is a master of disguise as well.


3) Side Piece, usually a female that the guy uses only for sex and other pleasures, she is usually the one that he goes to for that 3-some or some late night head after the club. When Wifey is acting up and Baby Girl is at work, the Side Piece is usually the one to hold him over for
a few hrs. He can meet with the Side Piece for reasons other than sex, but normally that only happens one week during the month. Side Pieces are hard to spot when they are out because most of her friends are either Wifey's or Jump Offs. Drawback of having more than one side piece, they usually know each other somehow...we kinda think there is a side piece network.com or something. Try to keep your side piece count below 4 if possible.


4) Jump Off...every mans dream and worst nightmare. She is trying to move up in life, wants to be a Side Piece or Wifey but doesn't know how to go about it. They are just the girls he hollas at when he is with his boys...she is usually stored in the cell phone by a nickname because he barely remembers her real name and where he met her...he only recalls how fat her ass was. The Jump Off gets called in emergencies only, when wifey is moody, baby girl is on vacation and side piece is with her baby's father. The Jump Off is extremely dangerous in public for a number of reasons, she is usually 5 other guys jump off as well, so she might cause drama with you and one of those dudes if you slip up, she also has no problem confronting you in the mall when you are with Wifey (something that baby girl would NEVER do) and the most dangerous thing about Jump Off...she ALWAYS seems to find out where you live and or work.

06-18-07, 02:40 PM
LOL, that's horrible! What's even worse is that there are guys out there who think it's perfectly acceptable. In my world, I have:

1. Soon-to-be Wifey

And it'll stay that way!


Jonas McFeely
06-18-07, 03:00 PM
Yeah, i agree. I mean theres nothin' wrong with poundin' a few sluts or porkin' a few fat chicks here and there. But when youre in a serious relationship i beleive you should stick to that one person. Cheaters make me sick.

08-14-10, 07:15 AM
Shaking my head, whatever happened to marriage vows/covenants.

08-14-10, 10:33 AM
Seriously -- an over three year dead (and offensive, yet) piece of trash thread as your first post to comment on???

The post counter could still be turned off, and I would know yours was below, say -- 2......

08-15-10, 02:27 AM
I've met people who think this is normal and was still respectable enough to never put any of them into a coma, which is rare, as that is my personal hobby. Instead, I've left them bruised, several with broken bones and one about $4,000 in debt. I worked with this one guy once in Walt Diznee World, oh there are still stories about that...and I SWEAR his twin works at Autozone.

I am probably the only person who will say this, but whatever happened to celibacy?

Then again, I am such a mental defective, that if everyone on the planet, but me suddenly died or vanished from existence, I would go on living happily, in spite of how "social" humans supposedly are. Then again, my "humanity" has seriously been in question since I was born with a dead twin, open eyes and those pointy teeth people remember me by.

08-15-10, 02:27 AM
Seriously -- an over three year dead (and offensive, yet) piece of trash thread as your first post to comment on???

The post counter could still be turned off, and I would know yours was below, say -- 2......

I think she created the account simply to post on this thread. The name seems oddly in-tune with the thread, no?

08-15-10, 08:49 AM
Wait wait... if a beach you visit only has four different types of girls, you're at the wrong beach.

I would call that La Playa de de falta.

(Failure Beach)

08-17-10, 12:34 AM
Yawn. how do I translate Dullahan to Sting?

Boring Joke is Boring.

08-17-10, 03:42 AM

08-17-10, 09:15 AM
I have Wifey. Married 27 years. Never cheated, ever!
When I met Wifey, she was scortching HOT ! HOT slowy faded.

HOT Wifey & I are now both 63. Hot Wifey is stone cold. But, the best friend, wife, companion anyone could ever wish for.
I would, could NEVER cheat on her. She has stood by me thru the bad times and been by my side as I battled Cancer. She comforted me when my folks died, when our beloved dog died, when I went thru 7 surgeries, she was there for me, always. I thank God that I never even entertained a "Side Piece" ~
I could not forgive myself, and I'd be harder on myself than most would be.